Last night the girls and I ventured out for the first time at night. We were invited by a friend to her Tastefully Simple party. Although I was quite anxious...it was all good. Gianna & I enjoyed the tasting of foods & Toni had fun with Chrissie's son Nick.
As I write this....I am also dealing with the normal things that aren't normal anymore. The girls wanted to toast bagels & since the bagels were in the refrigerator, when they went to split the bagel it broke and then they got upset that they couldn't "toast" the bagel because it broke. I did raise my voice & said..."are you serious- you are getting upset over a broken bagel ? Just stick it in the toaster & I will show you how to get it out if there is a problem !"
They just looked at me funny- so I softened the tone & said...come on girls...this isn't anything to worry over- let's figure it out & just enjoy your bagels- they toasted them & chatted about the melty butter.
I have to say......this past week there are SO many times I wish I could have Carmen back with us !! Not understanding why God had to take him away from us....we aren't finished with him yet & all the small things that go with it. I see couples smooch, the gentle touch or the look between a husband & wife & it reminds me that this will never happen again with my dear man. And when I see a couple that doesn't do this....I want to go over & remind them that life is too unpredictable and nothing is certain....so they should hug, kiss, hold hands and love each other a thousand times more than before.
The girls have had dreams about Carm & when they tell me about them....it just hurts my heart. Not that all their thoughts & dreams are bad- but seeing their pain in missing him makes me hurt. The mother in me wants so much to take away their pain & to make this all better.
Oh well.....enough of this for now....I've got alot to do today & sitting here isn't getting it done.
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